Section 1
My last article was about how I was looking forward to Retirement. What a joke! This has been the worst last two years of my life. To begin with, the year of my retirement, I contracted Covid- when there was no vaccine and nobody knew what it was- and it almost killed me. I was down from September to November and finished up with Pneumonia. By the time it was summer, I wondered whether I should have started that year of work at all since I was a high school counselor in a 1,800-student school. I was being careful but someone decided to come to school without taking basic measures to protect others and several people got Covid from that, me included. Can I prove it? Probably not. So the start of my retirement, even though I was trying to be positive in my previous article, was full of anxiety, depression, a sense of feeling lost, having no purpose, and bored to death--you get my point.
Things got worse after that because, in August, my little sister got Covid (the Delta strand was around) and after a month of battling it, she succumb to the disease. She is the first lady on the right (blonde) in my previous picture posting celebrating my retirement. That was June and in Sept she was gone. I still cannot get it through my head! Her health was not the best (diabetes, high blood pressure, severe gastritis, anxiety, etc.) Her immune system was basically shot and no vaccine to raise it up. It's funny how people think about what could happen in 10 years if some weird side effects happen, but who cares if you are DEAD today? I keep thinking that maybe I should have pushed further but I don't know if it would have made a difference, both in a change of decision or in her passing. The jury is out on that one, but guilt is a funny thing and hard to get rid of.
That whole month the family gathered at her house to pray for healing but nothing happened. I know that many of you can come up with 100 different explanations to justify or defend God, but emotions and love are a funny thing. Literally, the rug was pulled from under my feet. I used to see the Bible as black and white (first mistake). More on that later.
She didn't get vaccinated because she thought God will protect her, or because her mother-in-law survived Covid at 80+ with diabetes and previous cancer (I don't know). Other members of the family thought the same way, or maybe they believed the conspiracy theories. I don't know and honestly, at this point, I don't care. But the truth is that NO ONE was as sick as she was. I believe that she always gambled with her health and as adults, we don't always make the best decisions or care how it affects others. At the end of the day, the ones left behind are left to pick up the pieces, devastated. YES---I believe I will see her again but I miss her terribly now and has been very difficult to get out of the hole/dark place. It is important to understand something about me--- I have always suffered from depression, anxiety, and stress, and because of God, my husband, and my kids, I pushed forward to keep living and be the best I could be; but always caring what others thought of me. It gets old! Yes, it is OK to admit that you are not a superwoman or super anything and that every day can be a challenge. There are days that I don't want to get out of bed, but I do; my beliefs are on the other side of hell but He understands. Just read the Bible- you are not the first.
Today is June 1, 2021, and it has been one heck of a year. As of May 31, I am officially retired. Oh goodness, I dreaded and looked forward to this moment. I was debating between this year or last year to be my retirement year and I opted for this one. If I would have known what this year had in store for me, I probably would have retired last year. Lol. I got COVID on September 15, 2020. I was out of work for 3 months. The thing almost killed me: constant chronic cough, fever, weakness, lack of taste, extreme weight loss, hallucinations because of the cough medicine, hospital, and other things I rather not say here. (wink) When I thought everything was getting better, I got pneumonia. I'm thinking, this is it. Lord- here I come!! Slowly but surely I started getting better. The weakness lasted for a while. I would spend my nights and days praying, reading the Bible, and basically waiting on the Lord; which is not easy to do when things don't go your way. I am up and running now, but regardless, I had to be fine with whatever happened to me. If nothing else, I felt a lot closer to Him.
For the people out there that have suffered this terrible illness, or currently have it, I totally understand. It is ok to be discouraged, sad, have doubts, or be angry. After all, we are still in this flesh. Know, though, that Jesus is always with you through "thick and thin" and even if things don't happen the way we expect, it is still alright and He still loves you. We all need to remember that this world is still controlled by the Devil, even though he was defeated when Jesus died on the cross, but the enemy's time will come to an end when he will completely be eradicated from the Earth. In 2 Peter 3: 8 (NLT) the Bible says: "Do not forget this one thing, dear friends: that with the Lord one day is as 1000 years, and 1000 years as one day. The Lord is not really being slow about His promise, as some people think. No, He is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent". God is NOT SLOW. He is simply NOT on our timetable, but still very much in control. Also see Psalm 90:4, 2 Peter 3-4, Ecclesiastes 8:11.
I will post articles more frequently now and if you need any of them to be translated into Spanish, please email me and let me know. Go to ASK Dr. Corona. It will be my pleasure to do it for you. Until next time...God bless you!!
Going back to my retirement- it was bittersweet. I have been a school counselor for 17 years and total in education- 30 years. But surprise parties came from every direction which I am very grateful for. Here are a few pictures for you, to share in my happiness and blessings.
